274. Dare you fall in love?

The Pathology of Love by Sam Vaknin, Ph.D. - 11/29/2005

Recebts studies buttress the unpalatable truth that falling in love is, in some ways, indistinguishable from a severe pathology. Behavior changes are reminiscent of psychosis and, biochemically speaking, passionate love closely imitates substance abuse. Appearing in the BBC series Body Hits on December 4, Dr. John Marsden, the head of the British National Addiction Center, said that love is addictive, akin to cocaine and speed. Sex is a "booby trap", intended to bind the partners long enough to bond.

You know it's a good article when it starts off like that :D It goes on for a bit....YADDA YADDA YADDA.............and ends with

This natural drug creates an euphoric high and helps obscure the failings and shortcomings of the potential mate. Such oblivion - perceiving only the spouse's good sides while discarding her bad ones - is a pathology akin to the primitive psychological defense mechanism known as "splitting". Narcissists - patients suffering from the Narcissistic Personality Disorder - also Idealize romantic or intimate partners. A similar cognitive-emotional impairment is common in many mental health conditions.

The activity of a host of neurotransmitters - such as Dopamine, Adrenaline (Norepinephrine), and Serotonin - is heightened (or in the case of Serotonin, lowered) in both paramours. Yet, such irregularities are also associated with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and depression.

It is telling that once attachment is formed and infatuation gives way to a more stable and less exuberant relationship, the levels of these substances return to normal. They are replaced by two hormones (endorphins) which usually play a part in social interactions (including bonding and sex) - Oxytocin (the "cuddling chemical") and Vasopressin. Oxytocin facilitates bonding. It is released in the mother during breastfeeding, in the members of the couple when they spend time together - and when they sexually climax.

Love, in all its phases and manifestations, is an addiction, probably to the various forms of internally secreted norepinephrine, such as the aforementioned amphetamine-like PEA. Love, in other words, is a form of substance abuse. The withdrawal of romantic love has serious mental health repercussions.


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My Random Thots:

I know of a few who definitely have way too much b-Phenylethylamine in their system. It is interesting to note that the researcher did say that the enhanced secretion of this "love chemical" happens the first 2 to 4 years of the relationship. I guess subsequently they'll begin to notice the flaws of their potential mate. It's funny that when you break it down like this, it's so easy to understand. :P

273. A Busy Work day,

That's all I did, work, work, work. So I basically didn't get to do anything else. By the time I got home after work, it's already 8pm. Didn't do much but keep the idiot box company. Didn't feel like doing anything anyway. Looking forward to next weekend when Ando san is arriving. :)

272. Near miss

Aileen almost didn't make it to the airport thanks to me :P I blame the late nite. Well, bottom line, she did make it to the airport! I'd kick myself silly if she missed her flight, because her connecting flight to UK from KL an hour apart. So if she misses this flight, it would've set off a chain reaction which I'll hear about till the end of time.

After sending her off, headed over to Chong's apartment to pick him up. We decided to have breakfast at E-Gate while waiting for Lena's flight to arrive at 10:15. Jack and Ann joined us at about 10. I went to pick Lena up and headed back to E-Gate. We hung out till about noon.

The morning look - Jack, Chong and I

Then it's off to town to meet Lena's friends for lunch at Swatow lane. Thank God it wasn't jammed. Basically paid my sleep debt the whole afternoon. Had a quiet evening as well. Just what I needed after a fast paced weekend.

271. Isaac

While waiting for Seng to get ready for work, went over to the nursery to see Isaac. I'm telling you the kid is a natural party animal. Sleeps by day and active by nite. Look at this! He even sleeps ala "saturday nite fever" (I did not pose the baby!).

After a hectic day at work (I know it's a saturday, but unfortunately my customers don't). Went back thinking I'll get some rest. But as always, that's not to be. Had to finish up some stuff and by which time, it's already 7:30pm. Time to go pick up Aileen and gang from the hotel.

Aileen wanted to have seafood, so I've already got it all planned out. Pick up Aileen, Ping & Jo, rush up to Ah Pang's in Teluk Bahang and then back to Soho for their party. When I reach E&O, it seems they prefer to have a quick simple dinner and head off to Soho, so I happily obliged.

We went to Hong Kong Restaurant at McAlister road because they wanted to have "Oh Chean" (fried Oysters). Thank goodness for my previous experience with Adrian's friends, else, I wouldn't have known where to take them for "Oh Chean". I overdid the food ordering and we were stuck with 3 pcs of chicken wings, 1 Ikan Bakar (grilled Stingray), Wan Tan Mee, Hockien Mee, Char Koay Teow, Ar Tui Mee Suah (Duck Drumstick Mee Suah) and of course the "Oh Chean". There were quite a bit of food left over.

Head over to Soho and Tets (Not his fullname) was already there with a few friends(OK, OK, so I have a memory of a Goldfish when it comes to names). The party started nice and slow. Everyone said they're not gonna drink too much and it's gonna be an early nite. I've heard it all before :D

Seng and Wee also showed up later in the evening. This is, after all, their 2nd home. Devan showed up as well. He came back late last nite. He's back to pack his stuff and head back to KL for good. It seems he's been reassigned back to KL.

Well, the nite went by pretty quick and before long, it's time to call it a nite. The rest of the guys wanted to continue the party in the hotel room, but Aileen and Ping are too tired to go on. So I walked them back to their room and called it a nite. What a nite it was. It was a lot more fun than I thot it'd be. Made a few new friends.

270. Diving photos updated!

Finally got my hands on the underwater photos, so here they are. :) This will be added to entry #244 back in October 20th.

Batman in the water


Help!!! I'm being chased by a school of Barracudas


Me chasing da fishes


Peekaboo, I see u! Checking out the coral formations





Cute little Box fish


More of the cute little fella

269. The arrival of Dr. Aileen "Bek" Cheung

Aileen will be flying in tonite for her friend's (Ying & Samantha) wedding at E&O. Chuwy's wife & kids are sick, so he can't join us for dinner. Devan apparently is still out of town. Bee Hong's back in KL, so guess it's just us.....and Aileen's UK mates :)

Picked her up at 6pm and we headed off to Super Tanker for dinner. We had a good time chatting and I asked her where's she staying and with who. She mentioned she'll be sharing a room with Ping and Jo. She added that Jo already checked in and Ping will be arriving shortly. Since we're near the airport, I told her to give Ping a call and we'll pick her up as well. I'll get to collect taxi fare :P We did manage to pick Ping up.

We went downstairs to meet up with the rest of her gang. Was introduced to so many new people that I had problems getting all the names. I'm sure as the nite goes by, I'll eventually get all the names. Was surprised to see Audrey there as well. My goodness, it has been 10yrs since I last saw her. Was pleasantly surprised that she still remembers me. What a small world.

It's was bit wierd seeing so many chinese people speaking with a strong British accent. Some are British born chinese and some stayed way too long over there. :)

Secondly, it's wierd to be walking from E&O hotel to Soho and have people calling out to Aileen and not me :P Hey! I thought we're in Penang? Where are all my friends? Looks like Ying and Samantha have invited lotsa UK friends and they actually flew all the way to Penang just to attend their wedding. They must be close.

Spent the rest of the nite at Soho catching up with Aileen and updating each other. Gosh, it's amazing after all these years she's still the same, despite getting permanent head damage and the title Dr. :) It's good to know that eventhough so much time has passed, she's still the same person. It's comforting knowing that along the way, I've found good sincere friends.

I need to remind myself to bring my camera, but I'm sure I can "steal" some shots from Aileen later.

After dropping Aileen off, walked back to my car in E&O's car park. To my horror, the exit of the car park was chained up. Now why the heck would someone do that? I didn't feel like walking all the way back to the lobby and all, so I *ahem* rammed the chain. I reckon it'll leave minor scars, but hey, my car has got so many scars on it that one more wouldn't be noticable.

Good nite.

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My Random Thots:

Hmmmm, I wonder if people say the same of me as a friend

268. A whole day of seminar

The seminar was boring, nuff said!

Went for dinner with Adrian and Jack. When I reached home, it was lights out until 1am when I have to chat with my customers again. Hopefully this is the final call and the issue will be resolved.

267. Another day out

Met up with Chong, Hiromi, Adrian, Jack, Ann and Shibata. Had dinner and Green House and adjourned to Baskin Robbins for dessert. It's Shibata's last day here and so we said our goodbyes.

Headed home and had to stay awake coz I'm waiting for a very urgent and important reply from my customer in US. Damn the time difference. So while waiting, I had time to blog and also Astro as company. They are sure taking their time in replying. It's now 3am and I'm watching Ed on Starworld channel. It's interesting. The show's finale next week will be very interesting watch. I might just try to catch it :D

Tomorrow I'll have to attend a training in the morning. Good thing it's only until 1pm.

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My Random Thots:

"If it's not meant to be, nothing in the world is gonna make it work,
If it's meant to be, you gotta do everything you can to not let it slip away."

- Ed Stevens

266. Steamboat

Took my car over to the mechanic for a regular servicing, found out that the exhaust had a leak and had to replace it. Now, it's much quieter :) hopefully the fuel economy would improve too. Now I can enjoy the radio and music better :D

After work, Chong came over to pick me up and we head to town for dinner. We stopped by Evergreen to pick up Shibata as well. Then it's off to this BBQ steamboat place opposite Continental bakery at Swatow Lane. It's a buffet style dinner where you eat all you can for RM16. Boy it was worth it. I basically had 3 ice creams on top of the hefty dinner. Good thing I didn't have time to have lunch. This definitely covers lunch and tomorrow's breakfast. We adjourned to Segafredo in Belissa Row for tea after that. What a nite. I'm gonna explode d.

265. Busy busy busy

Friday
Hmmm, all I remember is it's a busy day at work and I stayed pretty late. Can't really remember what happened at nite. I'll check with my bros to see if they remember anything.

Saturday
It has been a very very busy weekend. Hardly had time to sleep. Saturday morning was filled with running around making deliveries to customers. After that, went home and had to get ready for thanksgiving dinner at Sally's. Turns out I got the wrong message, it wasn't dinner at Sally's it was dinner at her friend's place. The dinner was amazing. We had pumpkin soup, lasagne, beef kebab, salads (note plural), fried chicken and blueberry crumble. Ate until my pants burst. Hung around a bit until Adrian called. It's time to hit the town. They wanted to go Segafredo at Penang road, but apparently it's full so they had to adjourne across the street to Coco's (or the pub formerly known as Bungalow). Stayed until 12ish when they all had to leave. I bid them farewell and headed over to Soho where my brothers are. Spent the rest of the evening there. Jo popped by for a bit.

Sunday
Adrian woke me up and asked if I'm going to church.....guess I am now! :D We had to pick up Chong's friend Shibata from the airport at 11am, so it's gonna be a short stay at church.

Picked up Chong's friend from the airport and she looks uncannily like someone I know. Gosh, a doppleganger. Anyway. Spent the rest of the day eating and hanging out. mostly at Gurney plaza while the girls go for their foot reflexology. Bah, called it a nite early.

Went home and chilled with Seng and Wee while watching Deuce Bigalow: The European Gigolo. That was a funny show. :)

264. A slow start

Was working from home in the morning. Ruyi was in a playful mood, so I played with her a bit.

263. My dive card

Received my open water diver's card in the mail last nite. Was excited :) No comments on the pic ok, it was the only passport sized pic I had. :P Spent the evening with Chong at Starbucks E-Gate. We had to do some online "research". Jack and Ann joined us for a short while and left. Jack had to send Ann back home becoz tomorrow is her first day at work.

Adrian dropped by later. Jo showed up with her cousin Karl (the only other Karl I know is Mr Marx). Heh heh.

Another long day tomorrow. So guess that means an early nite.

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My Random Thots:

It is in changes that we find purpose. -- - Heraclitus

This is the quote that set me off in my adventures. Got me outta my comfort zone. Screw up, but screw up doing things differently or different things :D

More quotes by Heraclitus

262. Yew Peng's B'day

Haven't uploaded the pics yet. But we spent the afternoon at midlands one stop to look for his present. We couldn't find anything serious, so we bought some funny figurines :) After we're done shopping, Chong dropped me off at Soho for me to meet my bros.

Stayed till 11pm and headed over to Starbucks E-Gate to celebrate Yew Peng's birthday. I bought him a slice of cake and made him pose for some pics, he's very anti paparrazis. I'll upload the photos once I get my hands on them. We had loads of fun. :)

Yew Peng's present :)

Reached home around 1:30am and my bros are still up so I joined them. Had a chat about life.....as always. End up, I got an early birthday present from Seng. He bought me a Zippo lighter :P I just like to play with it and he bought me one. :D Gee, I thot it was Yew Peng's B'day.

My Birthday present! :)

261. Calvin & Hobbes

Back in September this year, Bill Watterson launched a new—and best-selling—23-pound, 1,440-page hardback anthology The Complete Calvin and Hobbes, but at USD150, I'll wait until I'm a millionaire before I'd buy it. I already have most of his publications anyway. As I was growing up, Garfield was my favourite comic strip. Used to bug my mom to take me to Penang Plaza just so I can read the comics at the Times bookshop there. Later in life, I was introduced to Calvin & Hobbes. It was love at first read. By then, I can afford to buy them on my own. And it was easy to get me B'day presents. All one has to do is get the latest publication and I'm a happy camper. Currently, there are only 2 comics that I still read to amuse myself. Dilbert and Calvin & Hobbes.

Article on MSN on Calvin & Hobbes - The last great newspaper comic strip

The Appeal of Calvin & Hobbes slide show

Chuwy left for a cruise with his entire family today for a week. Guess I won't have a lunch buddy for the week. Sigh.

Raine is discharged from the hospital just now. Both the mother and child is now safely at home.

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My Random Thots:

Oh Look! It's the Ah Long from Dreamland. Damn, guess it's time to pay my sleep debts. Nite nite world..........what I wouldn't give for a nice warm bolster that hugs back.

260. 'Twas an intense 24hrs

Went for my colleague's wedding dinner yesterday evening at 7:30. It was the first wedding dinner I've witnessed that instead of having cute little children or the bridesmaid walking in front of them during the grand entry, the couple had a ballerina. This is not the cute little ballerina either. We're talking a fullgrown (and I'm being kind here) lady in tutus. I was trying really hard to keep my expression neutral, but God knows it's hard. And seeing Seng & Wee's expression didn't help either. What I'll give for a camera then. I was seated right next to the red carpet and I swear, she almost knocked out everyone on both sides of the walkway (me included). It's just plain awkward! I wonder if they actually had a rehearsal. I doubt it. I'm not being mean when I say the whole scene reminds me of Disney's Fantasia. Only the pink hippos were more graceful ballerinas. Then there's the violinist. She was very very obviously faking it. She was dancing and spinning and twirling all over tha place, but alas, the food outshined her. The food outshined her, Ay, there's the rub. The food was good. After that performance, I took my premature leave.

I rushed over to Kepala Batas to meet Yew Peng and Tomoko and then after picking up Ah Lai and Nicholas, we went straight to Chong's grandma's funeral wake in SP. Stayed till about 1am and drove back. Thought that's the end of a dramatic day, but it's not to be.

Once I reach home, Raine said she's in pain and will be admitting herself to Island Hospital. After 13hrs, finally Isaac is born into this world at 17:34hrs. Raine won the money pool we had earlier. Wee commented that of coure she won the pool. He claims that this is what happens when you bet against the bookie. THE BOOKIE ALWAYS WINS!

Isaac and his proud and relieved parents

Rushed over after work to see my nephew. :)

My sick brother watched the whole process. Right up to when they stitch her up. He said from now on, in bed, they'll just hold hands. He said that after watching that, one's view of the "world" changes. Serves him right! Who ask him to be hero! He wanted to tell me about the "beauty" of child birth in detail. I politely declined and told him that my time will come.

Of course we had to go over to Soho to celebrate the event. I bought cigars for everyone. It has been an exhausting day for all of us, so Wee only invited 2 of his closest friends and just chill. All of them are married so they're having a meaningful conversation about married life and children. I can understand married life, but kids are a totally different level. I just sit and listen....yea yea, a rare thing.

The happy father enjoying his cigar at Soho

ahhhh, sometimes, watching the blissful married lives of my brothers makes me wanna go and get..............a new car or a puppy even, anything to distract myself. :)

Finally slept at 5am. Boy O boy, it's gonna be a long long day. Help me Jebus!

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My Random Thots:

A wedding, a funeral and a Child birth! All in 24hours. That'll bemuse me alright. Hmmmm, sounds like a good movie title this one is. A wedding, a funeral and a Child birth!

259. Brain Teaser

Let's get your brain to work!

Can you find the man in the picture in 3 seconds?

According to medical research:
If you find the man in less than 3 seconds, your brain is developed above the normal brain.
If you find it in a minute, you have a normal developed brain.
If you find it between 1 & 3 minutes, your brain is responding slowly. Protein in-take might help.
If it takes you more than 3 minutes, your brain is responding too slow and perhaps more excercise like this might help you develop that part of your brain.

This is not a joke, the man is really there!

I have a normal developed brain. It took me less than 10 seconds, but i'm quite sure more than 3 seconds. Don't know for sure.

258. A lost for Chong

Chong's grandma passed away last nite. Sent my condolences and went over to see him today.

Reminds me of my grandma's passing. She passed away when I was in US and my parents didn't tell me immediately coz they know I'll want to come back. So they told me only after the ceremony is over. I thought that was mean of them. I can't imagine that I used to fight with her for the TV. I still remember sunday evenings at 5pm. My cartoons will be on and her chinese drama also. She wins and I sulk :P

Sally invited me for dinner with her family in the evening, I declined as I can't make it back in time. Finally reached home past 9pm. Yawn. Need to pay my sleep debt.

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My Random Thots:

Watched the show House on Astro

Dr House said, "People like to talk about other people. makes us feel superior, makes us feel more in control & in some cases makes us care more. :)"

I wonder

257. A beautiful start to the weekend

Thursday
Started the day early with McD's breakfast. Can't sleep, so decided to go out and get me some McD's. Bought for Wee and Raine as well. Seng is still in Muar with Fen and Ruyi to visit his in laws.

After breakfast, headed over to Adrian's house. We were suppose to go for golf with Lai and Nicholas. It was raining very heavily, so I figured the course won't dry on time. So we just hung out at Gurney Plaza until Adrian's friend from KL to reach.

They finally reached in the evening and we headed up to Lone Pine to meet them. Lone Pine is really nice. Beautiful place. Was introduced to Adrian's friend and they're very pleasant. We took a walk by the beach. A memorable start that was ;)

Strolling by the beach and the beautiful sunset

They wanted to have seafood, so we wanted to take them to Tanjung Tokong's seafood, but they were sold out. So we turned around and headed up to Ah Pang at Teluk Bahang. Had a very nice and sumptuos meal. After dinner, we took a stroll along Batu Ferringhi and then went over to Sea Breeze for a drink. Got to know Adrian's friends better from travelling in the car with them. Really nice and warm friends they are. They're very easy to get along with and really made an impression with me. Finally went for supper at Hong Kong restaurant along McAlister Road. His friends really wanted Oh Chean (Oyster Omellete), so we happily obliged.

Finally called it a nite and stayed over at Adrian's place coz he was too lazy to send me back home. Good thing too, I've had enough of sitting in cars :P

Friday
Jefferson flew in to Penang and we will be meeting him for lunch. Really wanted to go Para sailing with Adrian's friend as I've never done it before. Too bad, his friends never called him back. Wonder if I'm just not wanted :P heh heh. So, in the end, went over to see Jeff and bought a few DVDs (Stealth and The Marksman) and CDs (Slow Rock Vol 2 & MTV top Charts). We went over to Gurney Plaza after that and on a shopping spree. Lai needed to get a few items. So while he was busy shopping, I accidently shopped too :) Bought meself a pair of Hush Puppies shoe and a pair of Timberland sandles.

Met up with the rest of the gang for dinner at Northam Beach Cafe. Jack bought a new "toy". It's a French Bulldog and they named him Murdoch. I must admit, it's a rather cute bugger. Looks a bit like Chuang's Roger. After dinner, headed up to Pearl Hill Villa to meet up with the White Water Rafting group. They're having a stayover and BBQ tonite and head off to Sg Kampar tomorrow morning.

Jack and Murdoch - This is such a natural shot

Murdoch the French Bulldog

Chong forcing Murdoch to pose :)

Was actually considering dropping by to see Adrian's friends one last time at Bagan before they go back to KL tomorrow. Alas, Adrian was too tired and didn't want to go. I didn't want to seem imposing and go there alone. So despite what my heart wants to do, I refrained and drove up Pearl Hill.

Was introduced to the rest of my new rafting "crew". Spent the rest of the evening bonding with them. Did manage to excuse myself to spend some time to reflect on things. Was getting restless. Haven't felt like this for a long time.

Saturday
Finally, I get to take another item off my to do list. Feeling excited. The trip however didn't get off on a good start. After passing the Juru toll, the van we were travelling in had a puncture. I figured I'll pull out my camera and capture the wonderful start of our trip. Whipped out my camera and to my surprise, it ran out of juice. No worries, I have a spare batt. Switched the spare one in and to my horror, it also didn't work. Gosh, it seems that I have only my phone camera to capture this memory. After fixing the tire, we pushed on. Got to our destination without further hitch.

The start of our journey :)

The white water rafting experience was as what I expected. Had a really good time. Gosh, maybe I am an adrenaline junkie. I hope we can get some photos of the trip from our guide for free :P Oh! Found out that our instructor is my junior in high school. Damn, Penang is small.

The end of the "road". This is where we ended our rafting experience

After white water rafting, we were suppose to explore Gua Tempurong, but we got lost on the way to the cave. So by the time we got there, the cave guide has already taken the others in and we were left out. So decided to just change my clothes and continue reading my book. It's a good thing I brought my book along.

left Ipoh at 5:30pm. Ran into a very bad jam at the Ipoh toll. Finally got home only at about 8:30pm and headed to East Coast coffee shop in Paya Terubong. Haven't been there in 2 years. The food is as good as I remember it. Ah, the memories of this place. Some memories, despite one's best efforts to erase them, seems laser etched into the brain.

Since I'm still awake, decided to watch The Marksman which I bought yesterday. Well, the show was full of cliches and the story line and acting was really crappy. Gosh, looks like Wesley Snipes is on his way down.

Sunday
After getting a wake up call, went to church. Church was typical except that instead of worship with live musicians, the pastor decided to use minus one videos. Must say, it was pretty well done. Waited for Chong and gang to show up and decide where to meet. They're still stuck in BM, so I reckon I'll wait for them in church. Since I'm in church, might as well attend their youth meeting. Interesting topic. They were discussing dress codes :P the speaker was a tad graphic i think. He actually mentioned that he can tell what color the panties of some of the girls there. Gee, and I thot u get graphic talk like that at pubs only. :D

Finally went over to Winter warmers at Gurney Plaza to meet Chong and Hiromi first. The rest will be there shortly. After everyone has arrived we had dinner at Seoul Garden. It's a steamboat BBQ place. I had an accident while making chendol. Suffice to say that I spilled santan all over the counter and dripped all the way back to our table. Don't think the cleaners there was amused. I still think we didn't get our RM37++ worth. But nonetheless, stuffed to the brim. Was suppose to meet Penny & gang at Kayu for supper, but I'm too tired and full now. Also my diorrhea didn't help. Time to call it a nite. Seng, Fen and Ruyi is back, but guess it's too late to wake Ruyi up for a huggy :D, instead, I go kacau her father and Wee. We just chatted a bit to see if anything interesting happened.

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My Random Thots:

Twas a very interesting and emotionally stimulating weekend. Despite the emotional ups and downs, I've never felt so alive :D

256. Dragostea Din Tei

Wanted to figure out what language this song is written in once and for all. My guess was Thai as I first heard this in Thai Disco in S'pore and then in Bangkok and no where else. So I figured it must be Thai, until I heard it being used in the Chicken Little promos. So I did a search and found that it's actually a Romanian song. Chong guessed Japanese.

Romanian lyrics and English translation of the words to
Dragostea Din Tei
The real translation, not the made-for-America lyrics)

DRAGOSTEA DIN TEI
by Haiducii
Love from the linden trees
by The Outlaws

(Also performed by O-Zone)

- Chorus 1 (4 times) -
Ma-ia-hii
Ma-ia-huu
Ma-ia-hoo
Ma-ia-haha

Miya-hee
Miya-hoo
Miya-ho
Miya-haha
[These are just sounds.]

- Verse 2 -
Alo, Salut, sunt eu, un haiduc,
Si te rog, iubirea mea, primeste fericirea.
Alo, alo, sunt eu Picasso,
Ti-am dat beep, si sunt voinic,
Dar sa stii nu-ti cer nimic.

Hello [on a cellphone], greetings, it's me, an outlaw,
I ask you, my love, to accept happiness.
Hello, hello, it's me, Picasso,
I sent you a beep [cellphone signal], and I'm brave [or strong],
But you should know that I'm not asking for anything from you.

- Chorus 3 (2 times) -
Vrei sa pleci dar nu ma, nu ma iei,
Nu ma, nu ma iei, nu ma, nu ma, nu ma iei.
Chipul tau si dragostea din tei,
Mi-amintesc de ochii tai.

You want to leave but you don't want don't want to take me, don't want don't want to take me, don't want don't want don't want to take me.
Your face and the love from the linden trees,
And I remember your eyes.

- Verse 4 -
Te sun, sa-ti spun, ce simt acum,
Alo, iubirea mea, sunt eu, fericirea.
Alo, alo, sunt iarasi eu, Picasso,
Ti-am dat beep, si sunt voinic,
Dar sa stii nu-ti cer nimic.

I call you [over the phone],
to tell you what I feel right now,
Hello, my love, it's me, your happiness.
Hello, hello, it's me again, Picasso,
I sent you a beep [cellphone signal] and I'm brave [or strong],
But you should know that I'm not asking for anything from you.

Chorus 3
Chorus 1
Chorus 3

255. ADHD in adults!

A myth? Well, apparently not anymore! :) MSN articles on ADHD in adults. But it's not all bad news. It seems that ADHD can be a blessing. Check out an excerpt from the gift of ADHD by Lara Honos-Webb.

A Lifetime of Distractions
By Harvard Health Publications

ADHD is no longer just a children’s disease. Many adults are being diagnosed and treated for the condition.

Although we usually think of attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) as a problem affecting squirmy schoolchildren, it can be a lifelong disorder, an unwelcome and unruly childhood companion that can follow you all the way to old age. Brain imaging studies are finding distinctive patterns of neural activity in ADHD adults that match those in ADHD children. Family studies of parents and close relatives of ADHD children turn up statistically significant numbers of ADHD adults.

Studies of twins (identical and fraternal) reared in the same home environment have shown ADHD to have the highest heritability of any psychiatric disorder. It has nearly twice the heritability of asthma and three times that of breast cancer. Genetic studies of ADHD "carriers" have zeroed in on a number of genes involved in the regulation of dopamine, norepinephrine, serotonin, and other neurotransmitters. No one expects to find a single ADHD gene, but further research into the complex molecular biology that underlies memory, attention, and how we make up our minds could sharpen drug treatments for ADHD — and uncover new ones.

Top 10 symptoms of patient-suspected adult ADHD

• Poor concentration

• General disorganization

• Tendency not to finish projects

• Inattention

• Poor school performance

• Problems with time management

• Difficulty controlling temper

• Impulsive behavior

• Problems with anxiety

• Difficulty functioning at work

Source: Archives of Internal Medicine, June 14, 2004.


In the meantime, studies have shown that the same stimulant drugs used to treat childhood ADHD are safe and effective for adult ADHD. Atomoxetine (Strattera), the first non-stimulant approved by the FDA for treatment of ADHD, is also the first ADHD drug officially approved for use in adults as well as children.

The prevalence of ADHD remains a major controversy. The low-ball estimate is that 1% of adult Americans are ADHD-afflicted, but some experts say it’s as much as 6%, which would work out to about 10 million people. On the other hand, another study came up with a figure of only 0.5% among 40-year-olds. Disputes over these statistics reflect deeper questions. Does untreated ADHD explain unhappy lives filled with crime, drugs, and underachievement? Or is this another case of medicalizing a more diffuse problem?

What does it look like?

Perhaps the clearest picture of adult ADHD comes from studies of people originally diagnosed with ADHD in grade school and followed by researchers through adolescence and young adulthood. These studies vary widely in their estimates of ADHD prevalence, remission rates, and relationship to other psychiatric disorders. But over all, they show a high percentage — 80% in several studies —of ADHD children growing into ADHD adolescents. Such individuals have continual trouble in school, at home, on the job, with the law in general, and with substance abuse in particular. Compared with control groups, ADHD adolescents are more likely to smoke, to drop out of school, to get fired, to have bad driving records, and to have difficulties with sexual relationships.

"There’s a great deal of continuity from the child to the adult form," says Russell Barkley, a researcher at the Medical University of South Carolina. "We’re not seeing anything that suggests a qualitative change in the disorder. What’s changing for adults is the broadening scope of impact. Adults have more things they’ve got to do. We’re especially seeing problems with time, with self-control, and with planning for the future and being able to persist toward goals. In adults, these are major problems."

Poor time management is a particularly treacherous area. As Barkley observes, "With a five-year-old, time management isn’t relevant. With a 30-year-old, it’s highly relevant. You can lose your job over that. You can lose a relationship over it."

On the other hand, researchers have noted differences between the childhood and the adult profiles of ADHD. For example, children diagnosed with ADHD are overwhelmingly boys, but studies of adults have found that the gender difference is less pronounced. Are girls less likely to exhibit the hyperactive-impulsive "boys-will-be-boys" behavior that gets a teacher’s attention? Or do more boys grow out of the condition so that the gender ratio in adults is more even? No one knows for sure.

Childhood ADHD is divided into three categories: primarily inattentive, primarily hyperactive-impulsive, and a combination of the two. What these variants "grow into" in adults is an open question. Most experts agree that pure hyperactive behavior usually diminishes with maturity: Few ADHD adults are completely unable to stay in their seats. Yet many ADHD adults are restless fidgeters and pacers. The picture of adult ADHD is clouded by the question of psychiatric "comorbidities" — other disorders that are distinct from ADHD but can complicate the condition. Young ADHD adults generally have higher rates of antisocial personality, anxiety, depression, and substance abuse.

How is it diagnosed?

After a thorough physical exam to rule out other problems, clinicians question patients using standardized lists of ADHD symptoms to come up with a score on severity and persistence. The results are assessed in the context of a developmental, psychiatric, and family psychiatric history, including the patient’s prenatal, childhood, and school history. Clinicians can also draw on an assessment of the patient’s behavior by family members or on a patient’s reporting of childhood experiences. The reliability of retrospective self-reporting is a point of contention. Some studies suggest that it leads to underdiagnosis; others, to overdiagnosis.

Experts agree that there’s no such thing as adult-onset ADHD. According to the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV), a childhood history of ADHD symptoms, whether they were recognized, treated, or ignored at the time, is essential for a diagnosis of adult ADHD. But establishing a childhood history is easier said than done. If you were born before about 1965, you’re probably too old to have grade-school records that use a label like hyperactive. Over-40 hyperactives belong to the "runs with scissors" generation. Children with attention problems were often just thought of as lazy or daydreamers. A study of about 850 adults with ADHD published in the Archives of Internal Medicine earlier in 2004 found that only a quarter of them had been diagnosed with the condition as children or teenagers.

Psychiatry itself has muddied the waters by switching its labels. ADHD has supplanted attention deficit disorder and another diagnosis called "minimal brain dysfunction." The definition of ADHD has evolved from emphasizing hyperactive behavior to recognizing more complex neurological deficits involving the brain’s executive functions. Under newer definitions, non-hyperactive adults are more likely to pass the diagnostic threshold for ADHD, thus raising the overall prevalence.

Happy endings

Salvatore Mannuzza and Rachel Klein of the New York University Child Study Center, who conducted widely cited research on ADHD children aging into ADHD young adults, point out that statistics don’t tell the full ADHD story. Yes, their studies, like others, show trouble with jobs, education, and self-esteem. But nearly all of their subjects were gainfully employed. Some had achieved higher-level degrees and admission to medical school. Adult ADHD may be a lifelong disorder for some, Mannuzza and Klein conclude, but they can go on to achieve educational and vocational goals just like anyone else. ADHD precludes nothing.

What you should do if you have ADHD

Get evaluated. You need a clinician with experience in diagnosing adult ADHD. Most primary and family care specialists are used to treating or referring children, not adults, for ADHD. You may need to ask for a referral to a mental health clinician who knows adult ADHD. Find out if there’s an ADHD support group or organization active in your area. A good place to start is www.chadd.org, a national support and advocacy group for adults and children with ADHD.

Get medication. Medication is usually the treatment of first resort for ADHD (see above). Medications help but don’t cure the condition. For many adults, medication lessens the disorder’s internal noise and outward chaos, helping them to gain some sense of self-control.

Get educated. There is a large, and largely helpful, body of literature on adult ADHD. Edward Hallowell and John Ratey’s Driven To Distraction comes highly recommended. For more titles and additional information, try the National Institute of Mental Health (www.nimh.nih.gov/healthinformation/adhdmenu.cfm).

Get organized. Get a calendar — a large one. Get a personal organizer, electronic or otherwise. Build schedules and routines. Set up a "launch pad" near the door for keys, wallets, glasses, briefcases, and backpacks. Get a book about getting organized around your ADHD.

Get counseling. Adult ADHD can put tremendous strain on a marriage, a relationship, or an entire family. If your ADHD is driving you crazy, imagine what it’s doing to your spouse or your children. Many adults discover that they have ADHD only after a child is diagnosed with the condition. This is serious. You need to talk about it.

Get moving. Exercise is good for almost everything that ails you. For ADHD adults, it’s a healthy way to burn off excess energy, for example, before sitting down to work. Being an ADHD adult, you can’t just vaguely plan on working out or perhaps going to a dance class. You need to put it down in ink as part of your weekly schedule. Routine and habit are adult ADHD’s best friends.

Medications for ADHD

• Stimulants. Methylphenidate (pronounced meth-il-FEN-i-date) is the standby drug. It’s better known by one of the brand names it’s sold under, Ritalin, but is also available as a generic. Methylphenidate also comes in formulations that are intermediate-acting (Metadate ER, Methylin ER, Ritalin SR) and long acting (Metadate CD, Concerta, Ritalin LA). Dexmethylphenidate (Focalin) is a formulation of methylphenidate that is theoretically more potent and more readily absorbed than the older versions. A popular alternative to methylphenidate is a mixture of amphetamines sold under the brand name Adderall and, in a longer-acting formulation, Adderall XR. A distant third choice is dextroamphetamine (Dexedrine, DextroStat).

• Tricyclic antidepressants. They’re an option if the stimulants prove ineffective or intolerable. Desipramine (Norpramin), nortriptyline (Aventyl, Pamelor), and imipramine (Tofranil) are the ones most commonly prescribed.

• Atomoxetine (Strattera). This drug is a selective norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor, not a stimulant. It takes several days to build up to an effective level, but then continues without the hill-and-valley effects of methylphenidate and other stimulants.

In short-term trials, the stimulants seem to help 70%–80% of children, adolescents, and adults. When the drugs work, they increase attention span and suppress impulsiveness and frantic motion. But individual results vary widely. Some patients report a bounceback of symptoms or just plain grouchiness as the medication loses steam. The slower, timed-release formulations may get around that.

Another drawback is that the FDA classifies all stimulants as controlled substances. That means a written prescription is required for each month’s supply, and many doctors require regular return office visits before writing prescriptions. It’s a good practice because of the potential for abuse, but it adds to the cost of treatment. The timed-release versions add to the bill because they’re expensive. Atomoxetine, on the other hand, is not a controlled substance, so prescriptions can include multiple refills.

You need to tell your prescribing physician about any other medicines you’re taking, especially anything for high blood pressure or thyroid problems.

As an ADHD adult, you also need to recognize that ADHD adults are notorious for self-medicating, especially with tobacco, alcohol, and caffeine, but also with other drugs. Once you get some help with your ADHD, you may find that you start to work on a drug or alcohol problem that has gotten out of hand.

254. Happy Deepavali

Deepavali is a festival where people from all age groups participate. They give expression to their happiness by lighting earthen 'diyas' (lamps), decorating the houses, bursting firecrackers and inviting near and dear ones to their households for partaking in a sumptuous feast. The lighting of lamps is a way of paying obeisance to god for attainment of health, wealth, knowledge, peace, valor and fame. For more details on this festival, you can check out Festival of Malaysia.

Was suppose to go over to Pragas' place for lunch. Was really looking forward to this. His family has the biggest feast I know. :) The food has always been great and I reckon this year is no different. But alas, there's a really bad jam on the bridge. We didn't give up and tried to use the ferry. It was also packed! Looks like i'm not fated to pig out today. Well, as consolation, we will go for lunch with Chuwy and family and also Belle and her mom. The food was alright.

Decided to wash my car and do some misc DIY stuff since my afternoon is clear. Really not looking forward to work tomorrow.